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To help you out if you're a new writer or don't understand the way Mary Sue works, I've written some additional points below which will help you out. |
To help you out if you're a new writer or don't understand the way Mary Sue works, I've written some additional points below which will help you out. |
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| − | Kirei Aiko (きれい 葵子 ''meaning "beautiful lovechild").'' |
+ | '''Kirei Aiko''' (きれい 葵子 ''meaning "beautiful lovechild").'' |
== Background == |
== Background == |
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| − | Kirei Aiko is a child of Uchiha |
+ | Kirei Aiko is a child of Uchiha Minoru and Hyuga Haruka. Her parents moved out of Konoha when her mother was pregnant, setteling in the country, hoping to protect their daughter. When Aiko was 5, a group of shinobi came and attacked the house, wanting to kill Aiko because of 10 Tails she has been born with. Her parents were killed, and she was the only one left alive, killing the attackers. She fled to Konoha where she was taken into the local orphanage where she met Naruto and Sasuke whom she made friends with immediately. She was hated as a child and everyone was quite scared of her, as she often killed the children who were bullying her. Several assassination attempts have been made, but they all failed because she kept on killing the ANBU who came for her. With time, Orochimaru heard of her skills and began making plans of kidnapping her, equally likewise to the Akatsuki, who were also after her. Upon hearing the news, the people of Konoha promised to defend her at all costs. |
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| ⚫ | Aiko is often described to be quite beautiful, which is also indicated by her name and surname. Her name was given to her by Kakashi when she refused to join neither Hyuga or Uchiha clan after they were fighting for her. She has two different eyes, one containing Sharingan, while the other has Byakugan. Aiko has waist-long black hair with purple highlights in it and porcelain pale skin. She is usually seen wearing a black knee-lenght kimono, tied with a red obi and black ankle-length ninja shoes. Many girls tend to get jealous over her incredibly petite figure and giant boobs and hips, while she doesn't care what she eats. Ino often stalks her to see if she really doen't excercise or starve herself in order to maintain her looks. |
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| − | Narrator: Walks over to the wall of text and throws a kunai at it. The screen of text shatters like glass and the narrator faces the person looking at the screen. "You know, I don't like Mary-Sues. I'm a proffesional writing developer, and I can't accept underdeveloped projects. THIS. Is the true ending." |
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| + | ''Yes, yes... The original gothic lollita beauty that everyone loves and adores. Two different eyes, purple streaks, pale skin, flawless figure. HOW BORING CAN SHE GET?!'' ''Do not forget that she'd most likely also recieve the ''[http://naruto.wikia.com/wiki/Hy%C5%ABga_Main_Family%27s_Juinjutsu ''Hyuga Mark'']''. Yes, your beautiful beauty-chan will be walking around with a green mark on her forehead. I don't think Hyuga clan would just let her walk around with Byakugan unprotected like that...But with a Sue everything is possible, right? Make her fat, or make her have a weird nose. Or something! Skin problems <3 Hair fail! Or maybe her brain won't be reflecting her appearance? Or the other way around? Come on, be creative! Maybe you know someone in real that you can inspire your OC's appearance on? Think about it :) Even everyday people on the bus :p'' |
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| − | Itachi, Orochimaru, and everyone else in this poorly written fanfiction snapped out of the genjutsu that the Suethor of Keira placed on them by a well-intentioned reviewer. They were not happy. Itachi killed Keira and everyone continued on with canon, all forgetting her since the fanfiction was deleted due to the Suethor being incapable of being shown the truth of Keira being a Sue. The End. |
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| − | ==Personality== |
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| − | Keira: Stares at the word dumbly. "What's that?"<br /> |
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| − | Narrator: Turns attention to the Sue, and sweatdrops. "It's your personality... it's..." Stares at her unchanging face, and decides to put it in terms easier for a Sue to understand. "You know? 'Cheerful, quiet, sad, happy-go-lucky, calm..."<br /> |
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| − | Keira: Her face lightens up. "Oh! Then I am cheerful, perky, pretty, powerful, popular, loved, pretty, sad, carrying a DARKU HIMITSU-"<br /> |
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| − | Narrator: Eye twitches at the romanized Japanese word for secret inproperly said and smacks forehead.<br /> |
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| − | Keira: Continues oblivious "-unloved, pretty, modest, sweet, cruel, and misunderstood!"<br /> |
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| − | Narrator: Fingers kunai staring at the oblivious girl and starts to wonder if morals are overrated. |
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| ⚫ | Aiko is often described to be quite beautiful, which is also indicated by her name and surname. Her |
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== Abilities == |
== Abilities == |
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| − | Aiko is able |
+ | Aiko is able to use Sharingan and Byakugan on extremely high levels. She graduated the academy at the age of 4 and became a Chunin at the age of 5. By the age of 8 she was asked to become Hokage. Most of her skills are unknown to many, due to her being trained in private and individually by Kakashi and Gai. Gai mentioned at some point when she was a genin that she is above his level at Taijustu, and Kakashi's with the Sharingan. She is extremely fast, which is why it is easy for her to avoid her enemy from reading her moves. She can copy bloodline limits. Aiko has unlimited chakra because of the Ten Tails inside of her. She can control the Ten Tails without a problem, and the demon is always protecting her. She has all the five chakra elements. |
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| − | == '''<u>''Additional Points ''</u>''' == |
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| − | *To make a character you have to be realistic. In this case you have to make a realistic shinobi. No personality native to another real world country. Like having American references when the character is in a different continent. |
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| − | *Research. Naruto is a very developed anime, and it even has its own continent. Learn the customs, continent, and habits of the people native to the lands. Learn about their personalities, and what has happened in their country. You want a character with a disability or illness? Research it. You need to know everything about something before you use it in writing. You can't use a pencil if you don't know what it's for. |
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| − | *You don't need to have your character interact with canon (real) characters. You can make your own story, without interactment with canon characters. |
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| − | *Never do OOC (out-of-character). A good writer will keep characters IC (in character). Who would Naruto be without being cheerful? Or who would Sasuke be without being self-centered? You have to keep them themselves, you don't bend the canon characters for your character, you bend your character for the canon characters. |
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| − | *Keep your OC at a human level. No other jinchurikis, no non-human characters. It's cliche'. |
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| − | *Avoid bright, differing colours in genetics. Clashing colours in hair, or two differently coloured eyes. Avoid "eyes change colour according to mood" at all costs. These are cliche' things. You can have someone with let's say blonde bangs and brown hair. Appearance does matter, but overall it should be personality that's most developed. |
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| − | *Don't create a character with the sole purpose of being a canon character's close relative, like a fourth Sand Sibling. Don't create a character with a backstory involving a canon character; i.e. Naruto's best friend from his childhood. You can however let the OC hear of the canon character if it would make sense. Like Sasuke the famous Massacare survivor or Naruto the jinchuriki. |
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| − | *Come up with Japanese names. It makes sense, everyone has a Japanese name. Don't copy a canon character's name, or a similar sounding one (Sasuke, Naruko). Name websites are easily found, and you can even look in a library for a name book. Make it Japanese, and make it original. |
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| − | *'''OVERALL. The most important thing to creating is to develop the character. Develop the personality. Everything has a reason, and they have reasons for their personality. Think about your character a lot, in school when you finish your work, at home when your bored, standing in line waiting to check out, think about them. Ask yourself "What would my character do in this situation?", "What would my character order in this resturant?", "What would my character say to someone they're just meeting?". Remember, the character is a completely new person. <u>''Make them one.''</u>''' |
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| − | ==For Your Amusement== |
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| − | <u>Below is a kekkei genkai for your amusement--Mary-Sue of course.</u> Instant Kill no Jutsu |
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| − | Instant Kill no Jutsu will kill your opponent no matter how strong they are or what skills or defenses they have. There is absolutely no defense against this technique and it can be performed in an instant, with minimal effort, and as many times as the user wants. It can also instantly kill large groups of opponents, up to 1,000 at a time. |
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| − | This jutsu is especially good for saving time, cutting short tedious trash talking and/or unnecessary explanations, and moving the plot forward. |
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| − | With this technique, you can also enter InstaKill mode. When InstaKill mode is active, and it always is, it will automatically kill anyone who even thinks about harming you, no matter where they are. So if some dumb ninja tries be stealthy and get the jump on you by hiding in a bush, he/she will explode as soon as he/she sees you. This also doesn't require any chakra so Instant Kill no Jutsu is always active. Its even active when you are asleep. |
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| + | ''Oh hell yeah... Just make her the Hokage of the Naruto universe, since you just made her more powerfull than all the Kages put together. Not to mention that at the moment Mei (the Mizukage) is the only known shinobi with two Kekkei Genkai's (and she's definitely not flawless, that's why we all love her :D)... If you are going to use the idea, do make it a good one. Maybe she can't do melee attacks? Maybe she's can only do range? Maybe she's defensive style only, attacking when it's least risky? Maybe she sucks at defence, but because she has something that lets her regenerate if she buys enough time? There are millions of possibilities! :o'' |
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| − | Instant Kill no Jutsu can't be copied by Sharingan, so don't even try that bullshit or it will automatically kill you. |
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| + | [[Category:Stuff for Writers]] |
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| + | [[Category:FINAL]] |
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Latest revision as of 15:22, 30 April 2014
Please note, that this is just an example of a classic Mary-Sue. I am not saying that if your OC has these traits, they are Mary-Sues. This is just a small example to keep in mind while creating an OC. This is not an actual character. Apologies if I used a name the same as your OCs, please just ignore that. To help you out if you're a new writer or don't understand the way Mary Sue works, I've written some additional points below which will help you out.
Kirei Aiko (きれい 葵子 meaning "beautiful lovechild").
Background
Kirei Aiko is a child of Uchiha Minoru and Hyuga Haruka. Her parents moved out of Konoha when her mother was pregnant, setteling in the country, hoping to protect their daughter. When Aiko was 5, a group of shinobi came and attacked the house, wanting to kill Aiko because of 10 Tails she has been born with. Her parents were killed, and she was the only one left alive, killing the attackers. She fled to Konoha where she was taken into the local orphanage where she met Naruto and Sasuke whom she made friends with immediately. She was hated as a child and everyone was quite scared of her, as she often killed the children who were bullying her. Several assassination attempts have been made, but they all failed because she kept on killing the ANBU who came for her. With time, Orochimaru heard of her skills and began making plans of kidnapping her, equally likewise to the Akatsuki, who were also after her. Upon hearing the news, the people of Konoha promised to defend her at all costs.
Appearance
Aiko is often described to be quite beautiful, which is also indicated by her name and surname. Her name was given to her by Kakashi when she refused to join neither Hyuga or Uchiha clan after they were fighting for her. She has two different eyes, one containing Sharingan, while the other has Byakugan. Aiko has waist-long black hair with purple highlights in it and porcelain pale skin. She is usually seen wearing a black knee-lenght kimono, tied with a red obi and black ankle-length ninja shoes. Many girls tend to get jealous over her incredibly petite figure and giant boobs and hips, while she doesn't care what she eats. Ino often stalks her to see if she really doen't excercise or starve herself in order to maintain her looks.
Yes, yes... The original gothic lollita beauty that everyone loves and adores. Two different eyes, purple streaks, pale skin, flawless figure. HOW BORING CAN SHE GET?! Do not forget that she'd most likely also recieve the Hyuga Mark. Yes, your beautiful beauty-chan will be walking around with a green mark on her forehead. I don't think Hyuga clan would just let her walk around with Byakugan unprotected like that...But with a Sue everything is possible, right? Make her fat, or make her have a weird nose. Or something! Skin problems <3 Hair fail! Or maybe her brain won't be reflecting her appearance? Or the other way around? Come on, be creative! Maybe you know someone in real that you can inspire your OC's appearance on? Think about it :) Even everyday people on the bus :p
Abilities
Aiko is able to use Sharingan and Byakugan on extremely high levels. She graduated the academy at the age of 4 and became a Chunin at the age of 5. By the age of 8 she was asked to become Hokage. Most of her skills are unknown to many, due to her being trained in private and individually by Kakashi and Gai. Gai mentioned at some point when she was a genin that she is above his level at Taijustu, and Kakashi's with the Sharingan. She is extremely fast, which is why it is easy for her to avoid her enemy from reading her moves. She can copy bloodline limits. Aiko has unlimited chakra because of the Ten Tails inside of her. She can control the Ten Tails without a problem, and the demon is always protecting her. She has all the five chakra elements.
Oh hell yeah... Just make her the Hokage of the Naruto universe, since you just made her more powerfull than all the Kages put together. Not to mention that at the moment Mei (the Mizukage) is the only known shinobi with two Kekkei Genkai's (and she's definitely not flawless, that's why we all love her :D)... If you are going to use the idea, do make it a good one. Maybe she can't do melee attacks? Maybe she's can only do range? Maybe she's defensive style only, attacking when it's least risky? Maybe she sucks at defence, but because she has something that lets her regenerate if she buys enough time? There are millions of possibilities! :o