Talk:Shiori Ōkami/@comment-5298475-20120803135135

I really like her and the story of her clan! Just some little critiques: The whole thing with the 5 families reminds me a lot of the way Shizue's clan is set up, almost exact. I would try modifing that a tiny bit, but besides that it seems original. We don't really see to many animal-human close clan relationships in Naruto besides the Inuzuka.

You need to change or explain the curse. The curse you didn't explain at all how they got it So we basically just have to accept that they have a curse when magic doesn't exist in the Naruto realm, but if you are able to explain it well enough you can definitely make it work. If you are unable to make it work on your own you can just make the clan prone to a certain illness like you mentioned; which would make sense because their ancestors had such a close relationship with animals and wildlife.

Also you need to change her name. There is a lot wrong with it.

- First off her first name is a surname and her surname is a first name.

-Ivana isn't Japanese. It's Czech/Hebrew. The names of Naruto characters should always be Japanese. Or in the very least a similar language like Chinese, Vientnamese or Korean but that's still pushing it.

-Mileika isn't Japanese. It sounds more Arabic but I don't know the exact language because the name has a lot of variants. But I know it can't be Japanese because it has a "L". There isn't a letter "L" in the Japanese language. (Come on people do a little research before picking names)

These are just small things you can do to make the character more believable.