Talk:Hana Senju/@comment-26252910-20150528090714

Okay, nice start, but since you are the creator of this character, there should not be any unknowns in her background. Also, I fixed some of your grammar, but you really need to check your work before you publish it.

So, with commas there should be a space after it, but not before it. There were a lot of those around. I'm not sure if you do know this and they're just typos, but they seemed to crop up a little too often to be simple mistakes.

Also, keep an eye on your tenses (present/past). In a character profile like this, you should always be using present tense.

And just one more thing... I'm not sure why, but a few times you referred to your character as 'it' or 'he.' Unless your character is transgender or non-humanoid, you should probably stick to 'she.' =)

Other than that, good start. Keep up the good work. Oh, and I haven't edited the last paragraph at all, so you might want to check that one over too - something in the first line has gone weird. Half a deleted sentence, maybe?