Talk:Hanataba Muramatsu/@comment-5053045-20140609122501

Alright, I finally got around to this! So sorry for the delay!! I've been fairly preoccupied. X_X

Let's start off with the basics, as always.

Background: Hmm, an interesting set-up! It's something that takes a few seconds to explain and is acceptable. Everything is great up until the point that the Jashinists come in. My first red flag is that you mentioned a seven year old Hidan in the mix, which is impossible. Hidan didn't start the whole slaughter thing until many years later, when he became upset that Yugakure became a mere tourist attraction. And another thing, why Jashinists? It's not like Yugakure was inhabited with them, and if they were, why would they wait until their village became an offical hidden village to attack people? Not only that, but Jashinists find that anything less than utter destruction is considered a sin. It is most likely that they would have burned the house down after being sure they've gotten everyone, and with Hanataba's illness there's no possible way she would've survived that.

Everything else is ok except for that. Please work on that a little. :)

Personality: What is "sweet tempered"? Did you mean that she is patient/sweet?

Everything else is fine.

Appearance: What is a "slight frame"?

Everything else is fine.

Abilities: Very well thought out! It's funny; this kekkei genkai of hers greatly resembles one that I once used for an OC of mine. Of course she doesn't use it anymore, but it's cool how great minds think alike! This is all fine. :)

Part I: All of this is fine.

9/10 Wonderful OC, dear!! :D